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“We are homesick most for the places we have never known.” ― Carson McCullers

Beautiful Voyager

April 25 · Issue #13 · View online
Finding flow every day.

“We are homesick most for the places we have never known.” ― Carson McCullers

Dear BVs,
If you ever said to younger me, “Someday you will question the usefulness of nostalgia,” I would have vigorously shook my head. 
"Memories are important! Memories are who we are!" I'd have petulantly insisted.
I was rhapsodizing about the still-near past even in elementary school: my 3rd grade playground, the smell of the movie theater where I saw E.T, the buying of my first cassette tape (Van Halen).
My mom attributed my childhood nostalgia to my birth month. “You’re a Cancer, ” she’d say. “You feel things very deeply.”
Is it because the crab carries its home on its back?
It wasn’t until I hit my thirties that I began to realize nostalgia wasn’t a badge of honor. The toting around of old diaries and ticket stubs no longer made me special. In fact, all that toting just made me feel like I was carrying around extra weight.
Those of you who have seen Moana know what I'm talking about.
Ada Calhoun explores this backwards-looking mentality in a recent NYTimes piece. She’s discussing research she did for a book about St Marks Place: 
Same discussion around my neighborhood every day.
Then Calhoun says something that really leaps out at me:
Nostalgia, which fuels our resentment toward change, is a natural human impulse. And yet being forever content with a spouse, or a street, requires finding ways to be happy with different versions of that person or neighborhood.
Maybe this crab has figured something out after all.
Nostalgia and contentedness have an inverse relationship for many of us. Do they for you? Is there a way to balance the two? Here’s a great place to discuss, on the Bevoya forum.
Love, Meredith
3 Good Reads
Welcome, Prince Harry
My Mother’s Mental Illness and the Legacy of Psychosurgery
New phrase: "attention pollution"
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