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No more French goodbyes.

The fast exit was how I handled single life, but I'm not single anymore.

Inspiration for overthinkers

April 18 · Issue #12 · View online
From Beautiful Voyager

The fast exit was how I handled single life, but I’m not single anymore.

Hola BVs,
I’ve never liked phone hellos, and I’ve never done a good job with party goodbyes. I get twitchy at both, passing them over for the cozier in-between moments.

The French goodbye, aka ghosting.
My non-hellos have annoyed some, but it wasn’t until single became married, then family, life that I fell into real trouble with my transitions. Ghosting is not an option when you have sippy cups, diaper bags, and stuffies to track down.
Having the bear wave goodbye is a cop-out, right?
This will sound simple, but it’s not: parenthood forced me to confront many of my bad habits. My French goodbye was a useful avoidance technique. I never had to say aloud, “It’s 8:30 PM, but I’m tired and my stomach hurts. I need to go home.” (Cause why couldn’t I be cooler? Like Gilda Radner in this story. She had advanced cancer at the time.) 
Alas, I was no Gilda Radner. I’d take my French goodbye, never building the skill of speaking up for my needs. Worse, I was internally clueless. My body would have to scream IT’S TIME TO GO before I’d go. Guess where that screaming is directed when you have two other people in tow? At the two people who least deserve it. 
Being a part of a family means facing your own bad habits and articulating your needs, no matter how uncool you reveal yourself to be. These days, I’m trying to get more comfortable with the uncoolness.
It takes effort to be this uncool.
Even though I gave up the French goodbye when my daughter was born 7 year ago, I’m now officially introducing…the California cruise. 
"Hey, my stomach hurts. I gotta cruise outta here. Great party tho!"
Love, Meredith
Podcast Talk
Episode #8: Baron Vaughn and His Inadvisable All-Cheerio Diet | The Hilarious World of Depression
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Stanford Law School WellnessCast™ by Professor Joe Bankman & Sarah Weinstein
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